Rose Really Rocks!

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2010-02-25T19:10:00.001-08:00

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2010-02-09T21:03:00.000-08:00

I'm really, really happy.
I'm taking ballet, and it makes me feel beautiful and strong (you'd never know how hard the simplest things are by watching the pros!). I'm kind of obsessed with it, also. It's what I spend my time thinking about, and I also spend tons of time practicing. I like watching videos of variations (my favorite is Esmeralda) and I hope some day (distant future we're talking here!) to go en pointe.
School is okay. No one likes doing homework, especially not me. But I've been doing the assigned reading and doing well on quizzes so far, and I feel confident about my smarts. I didn't really feel that way much last semester, but this semester I feel it's true. I only have one troublesome class (and you'd never guess which class it is - and I'm not telling!) and hopefully, now that I know a bit better what's expected, I'll improve. But all my academic classes are going well and I'm really absorbing the information!
Things between me and Steven are wonderful, as always :) I get to see him most days, and for this I am very thankful. We watch a lot of House together while falling asleep on his couch. It's really nice, except for once a few weeks back when we fell asleep and I couldn't make it to ballet because I overslept! I'm also getting really excited because it's about time for his acceptance letters to start coming in, and I want to know where he's going to school next year! I'm both so excited and so nervous! I'm hoping he gets into UCSD and gets a ton of aide so that we can get an apartment and a dog together. :)
I've been very proud of myself lately, and really happy as well. Of course, battling depression is never easy, but I think most days I'm good. Right now is a good moment. Life is good. :)

Second semester, so far

2010-01-22T15:39:00.000-08:00

It's been pretty good. I've only really had two days, but I like it.
My geography teacher's voice is somewhat like Doctor House and he's got a good sense of humor.
The geology teacher has some accent, I'm not sure from where, and she also has a good sense of humor.
My history teacher is a slow talker with an accent. The accent is understandable, but he talks really slow and doesn't have a ton of enthusiasm. I'm going to have to make myself sit in the front in his class. He seems nice enough, though.
My math teacher is probably pretty good. A young guy, probably a master's student. I'm just sad because I was anticipating a different teacher, the amazing teacher I had last semester. So, I'm a bit disappointed but I'm sure I'll get over it.

It's been really rainy here. Last night it hailed! Really hard! It was funny and a little frightening! There was thunder and lightening, too. And twice now while I was driving the rain got extremely heavy! Like, windshield-wipers on full blast isn't enough type rain! I think I handle it pretty well, but I hate all the idiots who can't drive in the rain.

I'm probably going to get a hair cut tomorrow. I need a trim and have the layers re-done. My hair has been bugging me a lot lately.

Steven has a new nephew and he is sooo cute! And so tiny! I'm not used to being around newborns (most of my time with Julissa was from 3mos and up), and Frankie is smaller than Luna was when she was born. He's also smaller than Sophie, but I didn't see her as a newborn.
Sophie has started to like me :) Makes me feel pretty good. It's probably because I play with her and stuff. She's so adorable. On Sunday, I think, she had cat make-up on, and she was meowing. She was playing with something and hurt her fingers, and showed me her hand (y'know, kiss it and make it better) and I asked her "Does this finger hurt?" Her response: Meow.

Things are pretty great right now. I'm borderline nervous for school. I'm worried about my studying; I'm not used to studying so it'll be difficult. By the way, I'm taking geology, geography, geometry, history, Teaching as a Profession, and rowing. Too many studying-kinds of classes. And too many 'geo's.

RFOTD: I love eating raisins in slow motion. Like, turning one raisin into 8 bites. My new addiction.

Happy New Year 2010!

2010-01-06T21:46:00.000-08:00

Cadet Kelly is on. Can you say cheesy?!

So, this last year was definitely not as good as I hoped it would be. A lot of people died, most recently, my next-door neighbor, Mr. Huezo. I have known him all my life. Dad knew him almost all his life! He was good friends with both my dad and my grandpa! He's also my friend Johana's grandpa. He died of kidney failure, more or less. He had been on constant dialysis the last month or two of his life.

School went well, as you know, and I am now a sophomore with good grades. :) I got all the classes I was going for this semester, which starts on the 20th. Geology, geography, history, math, Ed 200, and rowing! I'm not too excited about all the purely-educational classes, but I'm very excited about rowing. Also, I'm considering taking summer school, so I can start off next fall as a junior.

I made quite a few new friends, and lost an old one, and repaired an old friendship also. I haven't gotten super-close to any of my new friends, but luckily I have the world's best boyfriend to make up for it :)

He's proven to me, a lot lately, how amazing he is. A lot of the times he's the only person I have to turn to, and I don't mind. He is an amazing shoulder to cry on, and he gives wonderful advice, not to mention he's a great cuddle-buddy. :) And he's not a half-bad driver!

I feel that I have improved and matured as a person. I have a genuine interest in learning; I always have, but it's showing more and more as I spend my free time reading articles on various topics. I also know how to make wise decisions; I feel like I've been making fewer and fewer mistakes. And while I know I'll never be perfect, and I know that mistakes are learning opportunities, it's refreshing when you consciously don't make ten million mistakes per minute.

This past year, although many things that happened were pretty darn... well, awful, I feel I truly grew as a person. I'm smarter than I was last year. I am wiser than I was last year. And, in general, I'm happier than I was last year. Maybe not always, but I find happiness in simpler things.

Basically, 2009 sucked, but I didn't.

Happy new year!

2010-01-01T01:38:00.000-08:00

I FINALLY got my last grade, and my final GPA for my first semester is a .....

....................

3.15! Sure, it's not fantastic, but I am so extremely proud. :) Just a few years ago I was a super-mega-failure because I never actually did anything, and now I'm a sophomore at a university with a 3.15 GPA.

I am elated. :)

One semester down

2009-12-16T16:57:00.000-08:00

I'm miserable,

but at the same time

I am so happy.

Things could be so much worse.

I love you.
Rose

RIP Aunt Silvia

2009-12-15T17:28:00.000-08:00

My Aunt Silvia passed away this Saturday morning/Friday night at 12:30 AM.

The short explanation is, she died of breast cancer.

The long explanation is that she had a stroke when I was about eight, and that initially left her paralyzed and mentally... altered. She recovered, physically, after a few years, but she was never mentally 'right' again - she saw herself as a burden onto others and was embarrassed by herself, and because of this, I hadn't seen her in 9 years. Three years ago, she discovered a lump in her breast, and she was happy. So, she let the cancer progress without telling ANYONE at all for two and a half years, told her husband in March, and told her sister in October, who then told my family. Initially, we were told she'd have around six months to live, but she got worse and worse, and on Saturday she finally let go.

I was extremely upset over this, naturally, and I spent a lot of Saturday crying. I really miss her, the old "her," the one who took us to the Children's Museum and threw pennies into the pool for us to dive at. I really wish she had never had the stroke so many years ago, and I also really wish I could have known her better. She sounds like she was an amazing woman, but, as I haven't seen her since being old enough to truly care (You know what I mean), I never did get to know my Aunt Silvia. I loved her regardless, and I am very upset over this all, from many angles.

I love you, Aunt Silvia. I hope you're somewhere better now, and no longer in all the pain that has come along within the past decade.

I'll never forget you, or all the fun we had with you, or the purple slide whistle and Stegosaurus poster you bought me. <3

I am in love...

2009-12-14T18:16:00.000-08:00

with my new guitar. <3
P.S. Losing weight.

Thanksgiving

2009-11-25T17:21:00.000-08:00

is all up to me this year. Mostly.
I'm doing the turkey.

What are you thankful for?

I'm thankful for routines which save my sanity.
I'm thankful for my health, because, well, I'm healthy. I could just as well not be healthy, but I am.
I'm thankful for my boyfriend. Without you, right now, I'd have no one. Absolutely no one close to me.
But, I'm thankful that former friends have gone away. My new friends are all positive influences.
I'm thankful for my car, since I don't have to spend 2.5 hours on the trolley one way to school.
I'm thankful for my family, despite the fact that I can't stand any of you. <3
I'm thankful for my religion, which I have been finding the past two months, which has helped me with so much (including my sanity).
I'm extremely thankful that I don't have to worry about paying bills or even paying for gas. All I have to pay for out of pocket are clothes and dates.
I'm thankful that I know how to take care of myself.
I'm thankful that the scales are telling me "135" instead of "149"
I'm thankful for the friends I am, slowly but surely, making.
I'm thankful for good grades and intelligence.

College!

2009-09-01T18:13:00.000-07:00

I started college! Today was my second day. What have I learned?

People can smoke on campus. I knew that, of course, but it's so annoying when you're just sitting there and all of a sudden you're inhaling a ton of smoke.

I'm not fatter or shorter than everyone else. Lots of girls are short like me and I think my weight is kind of average! It feels pretty good knowing I'm not a whale or a midget.

Classes aren't terribly different... so far. There's a teacher and some students. The biggest difference thus far is that I have two teachers who we shall call Sarah and Nicole, which is cool! It feels good to call teachers by their first names. Also, there are two oldish people in my math class, both in their late 30's, early 40's. Interesting. Weird, but interesting.

Campus is pretty big but it's small enough that you can get from one place to another pretty quickly. And I think I've already got the basic navigation down.

A lot of the people look the same. They dress the same and have the same hair. There are a loooot of white girls. Not saying that's a good or a bad thing, it's just weird compared to the normal masses of Mexicans.

It's nice to have control over where and when you have lunch. :]

I'm going to have to learn proper time management skills!

2009-08-26T14:40:00.001-07:00

New laptop <33333

From Slurpees to Burpees (:

2009-08-21T12:40:00.000-07:00

I thought of that last night, as the title of my future weight loss book (:
Not that I'd ever write a weight loss book. Not that I like Slurpees anyway. Not that I've ever willingly done a Burpee. But it was cute. (:

And if I did write a weight-loss book, all I'd really have to say are: Aerobics and Portion Control.

Because really, that's all I've done. I've lost about 10 pounds. I know, that's not much, and I'm still ten pounds higher than my previous "fat weight," but I'm proud. Partially because I haven't really done anything.

I haven't worked out in about a week and a half, I'm guessing, and I've lost weight since then. And I don't really think it's necessarily due to "muscle loss" like it often is. I've just been eating less.

And it's surprising how effective that is! I eat less, I lose weight. Who would've thought?! But I'm still eating plenty, three or four meals a day! (: That and, for the past few days at least, sitting on the couch!

I've still got more weight to lose, but I am extremely proud to say that my BMI is now no longer in the "Overweight" category. (:

Mess prevails in this house.

2009-08-19T14:54:00.000-07:00

Last night, in a search for missing tweezers, I looked under the foot-part of the recliner. That's usually where they end up, since they fall through the cracks of the couch. Guess what was down there?
16 snickers wrappers. And a Reese's wrapper.

SIXTEEN.

And a banana peel was easily found, as well as a few soda cans and other wrappers.

Sigh.
Judi's been letting Johana's litt;e sister borrow our DVDs and, though we've gotten them all back, our DVD shelf is pretty vacant. And that's a loooot of DVDs.
I was looking for our Winterguard DVD and in the process piled all the DVDs that were just laying around, and I see one 2-ft tower and thre other smaller ones. And I worked so hard to organize those DVDs by color and alphabetically! There is also another drawer on the TV chest full of DVDs and game cases.

I want to clean and organize this house so badly, but we have waaaay too much crap (most of which is obviously unnecessary; most of which we can't get rid of) and literally less proper organization 'equipment' than an organized, empty house.

Seriously. The DVD rack-thinger five shelves tall and it [is/was] full. Our bookshelf has Mom's disney snowglobes on it (Why did we buy those in the first place?!) and not a single book. We have a toy chest full of children's books (why do we need those?! Or the toy chest?!) and of course my mom is a fan of "totes" [aka those rubbermaid bin things.]

Now, I am well aware that we need to clean and organize and get rid of stuff, and that we need storage things. Mom seems to knwo that to an extent, but she thinks proper storage are those larger-than-a-coffee-table "totes" and the way you organize is to shove all the junk in those.

We have a filing cabinet. The filing cabinet has almost nothing in it. Mom has many smaller totes with tons of papers "to be sorted" or that we can't throw away for whatever reason. Why doesn't she consolidate the two?! Who knows.

It seems like once every year or every two years, we "clean." Every time we do that, we end up throwing half our crap out and still having too much stuff, still having nowhere to put it. I wish that, for once, we'd spend money on a proper bookshelf or something, get rid of ALL the stuff we don't need/use/want and finally do more "cleaning" than shoving crap in a box.

Will that ever happen? Who knows. But I can hope.

I just wish the task was something one measly person could do.

Shopping trip with Johana!

2009-08-15T18:05:00.000-07:00

Johana and I went to Las Americas today because I needed jeans and someone to go shopping with me! And she needed some new clothes too, since her post-baby-body is bigger than her 'former self.' We went there because I knew Old Navy had jeans on sale for 19.99$ this week only. I actually didn't expect there to be many left, but there were.

I ended up getting three pairs from there and two from Anchor Blue, which I discovered has some nice jeans, cheap! $24.99 there! And they fit pretty well!
I got one 8, two 7's, and two 6's, all 'short.' The sevens from AB are a little tight around the waist but I like the way they fit everywhere else, and it feels good to knowt hat I fit into a 6 from somewhere.

It was also really nice hanging out with Johana. I remember two summers ago we spent most of the summer together, after summer-school trips to the beach, going to Pablo's baseball games at night, trips to the mall, etc. and I haven't hung out with her too much since then. But it's always fun hanging out with her. We aren't too similar but we always have fun, and shopping with her is great especially because she's honest about how things look.

My mom was nice and, since Dad told me today that he's not giving me money for clothes this year, she handed me her card and told me to take $100 and go to Las Americas. It was surprising and nice of her. (:

I think tomorrow I have a date, but I only have $14ish so I'm not sure if that's still on. We were going to go to Olive Garden, but I believe he's broke and apparently so am I. Oh well.

Hope you guys are all having a good weekend!

I always hated when other people did this, but...

2009-08-14T13:10:00.000-07:00

I'm going up to the school for the staff v. student football game today. Steven is going and I haven't seen him since Tuesday, so I kind of have to if I want to see him ever. Which is pretty ironic-ish, actually more hypocritical than anything, because I always thought "Jeez, get a life! You just barely graduated, don't you have anything better to do than visit the people you haven't seen in two months?!" but whatever.
I'll just say, I had a fun-ish night at our sleepover with Kayla, Azia, and Corrin. It was nice having that whole group back together, and it was fun for me for the first few hours. And then it turned Blah. But I shall not elaborate :3

I haven't changed the channel after What Not to Wear yet, and this Baby Story is stupid. I never liked this show but this couple is just kinda cheezy, I guess. Not to knock anyone's choices, but they're one of those all-natural, water-birth, "make noise so the baby drops lower..." and that all just seems weird to me. But, to each his own.

Well, I guess that's all I have to babble about right now.

:O My past few weeks, in a nutshell.

2009-08-11T19:46:00.000-07:00

This summer has been good but boring. I haven't posted much because my mom has been gone, in Vegas and San Jose, and she took her laptop with her. As y'all know, mine died a few months back for some bizaare, unknown reason. Mom ordered me a new one today! So maybe I'll get my own soon.

I've mostly been exercising during the day and watching a lot of tv, actually sleeping in for the first time in my LIFE, and spending my afternoons with Steven. (: It's nice, but it gets boring, and tv gets so monotonous, I suppose. There's only so many weeks in a row you can watch every episode of What Not to Wear... Sigh.

And I've lost a bit of weight; a few pounds, not much. It bounces up and down one or two lbs every few days. Either way, i'm proud. And I'm at the moment not eating "junk," but I still get to eat normal food to an extent. I'm not following a specific diet or anything, just smaller portions and eat at the same time each day, 3 hour incriments, 3 or 4 meals a day. No snacking. And I've mostly been doing "aerobics" things on WiiFit, and some free workouts on FreeZone. The ten minute workouts are good!

I'm getting really excited, yet really anxious, about school starting. I know my classes already, and I'll get my booklist next monday. I start in three weeks.
I'm taking intermediate composition, oral communication (both are required for my GE), Music 102 (which is terribly basic, but I have to take it for my major - I get to learn the recorder, apparently!), Math 210 and 212 which are math teaching/kid's math thinking, and a Compact for Success class which I'm required to take but sounds stupid. Also, since I scheduled it in such a way that I had friday off, but then I couldn't take one class, I signed up for Beginning Sailing, since my friend Kayla's dad has a sailboat and the few times I've been on it with them, I had a great time.
I'll probably start updating more often now that my mom's back, and also since my new laptop should be coming in the mail in a few days. Silly woman also bought me a printer! Wooh! I'm excited about that. (:

Oh! And I bought a size 2 denim pencil skirt at Gap and it miraculously fit! I mean, it's huge and I'm obviously not a 2, but it makes me feel sooo good about myself. :) I'm usually a laaaarge 8 (and it's only an 8 because I'm in denial and refuse to buy a 10 - double digits are scary!), but I can squeeze it on so I'm happy! :)

Somehow I'm nervous

2009-07-21T22:22:00.001-07:00

Tomorrow's orientation at SDSU. I don't know why, but I'm nervous. Paranoid.
I don't know. D: I don't know anyone who'll be there tomorrow; I'm going to be wandering around alone.
I am also going to drive all the way up there alone. Try to find the right parking structure, alone. Try to find where I'm supposed to check in, alone. D: see a pattern?

It's hardly anything to be nervous about; it's not like it's my first day of school. Not yet, at least! I guess it's just how I don't know what to expect, I don't know anyone there, and I'm worried about getting lost there. D: I'm just so nervous.

I'm not ready! I'm scared! And I hate being anywhere alone. DDD:

Gah!!!!!!~ My brain is going to fry tonight and I'll wake up as a vegetable.

Not to mention the fact that I have to wake up before 7; it starts at 8. DDD:

Scared!

I got my car. O:

2009-07-15T21:58:00.000-07:00

Blargh. Learning guitar, drivin' my new car. Saw Harry Potter last night. Ate tons and tons of fried potatoes today. Haven't gotten out of my PJs all day. Totally want a trapeze top. Saving my money to buy piggy a new cage.

I love my beautiful carro. It's the prettiest color blue and smells like new car smell (:

2009-07-08T12:41:00.000-07:00

:O Steven's going to teach me guitar!

He already taught me C, which is fairly basic. So I'm still pretty clueless.
But I do know the first little bit of the Iron and Wine version of Such Great Heights. (They do it sooo much better than Postal Service.)

The one time I do something the man likes,

2009-07-01T12:03:00.001-07:00

He doesn't care. >:l

I hate this family.

Johana's having her baby on the 2nd!

2009-06-29T15:28:00.000-07:00

Well, she's 33 weeks into her pregnancy and last Wednesday, her water broke! O: Which is bad, but exciting! I mean, 32 weeks is really early for her water to have broken. But they're giving her steroids for baby's lungs, since that is apparently one of the biggest problems with preemies.
Just so y'all know. O:

How cool is this chandelier?

2009-06-29T11:37:00.000-07:00

Brindilles by Ligne Roset

Woudl you rather have a clean body or a green lawn?

2009-06-27T13:27:00.001-07:00

>:l My father doesn't care about my hygiene, he cares about his vanity.
We are in for less than five minutes when he starts hollering "Shorter showers!!!"

cute sea lion! O:

2009-06-25T23:02:00.001-07:00

How cute! Read the story that goes with it. (:

I like playing with MS Paint.

2009-06-21T23:15:00.000-07:00

Beautiful, with a Rose

2009-06-21T22:59:00.000-07:00

Chris Nicholls Photography - "An English Rose"

Found it by StumbleUpon.

I want to get married in all of these dresses. At the same time.

I met someone awesome today!

2009-06-21T19:35:00.000-07:00

Pocahontas!
Well, the lady who did Pocahontas's voice. Not the real pocahontas, of course.
I gotta say, I feel so special! I looooved pocahontas when I was little! I have a pocahontas mug and watch, and I had so many pocahontas toys!

20ish miles.

2009-06-19T22:27:00.001-07:00

Probably closer to 16. But still. I went on a bikeride today, just to get away from the house. Just to do something.
Well, I rode from my house up to the school, to get a transcript, then wandered to the bike street-thing that goes along the strand. Made it all the way up, past the Cays, past Loews, past the amphib base, past Coronado city hall.... Up to the tennis center. Wow.

Boy are my legs sore.

Boy do I feel good. And, feel good about myself.

I don't know how I'm going to survive this next year at home.

2009-06-19T12:51:00.000-07:00

Gah.

Screaming match with my mom last night. I think it was amusing, mostly in the fact that everything she yelled at me for, was something I learned from her.

I slammed the door. "WAS THAT NECESSARY?!" She does it all the time when she's mad. I rarely do it. I was trying to instigate something last night, though.

She complained about me leaving my clothes on the bathroom floor. She leaves her clothes on her bed. "Not lately, I don't!" Nope, instead you leave them in huge piles in the laundry room. She's complaining about me not keeping mine in my dresser. Her dressers are full of clothes that either A. don't fit her or B. haven't seen the light of day in YEARS.

Well. I'm not going to keep explaining everything we yelled about. But basically most of the things she was mad about were things that she does, too. Things I learned from her.

I shall take care of myself.

2009-06-17T22:39:00.000-07:00

Don't laugh! I mean it this time!
If I don't take care of me, who will? Definitely not my family. Back in 5th grade Dad had no problem with me eating chocolate cake EVERY DAY for breakfast. He used to eat chilli every day! And just about nothing else!
I mean it this time. No brownies to sidetrack me.

I need to gain some discipline.

And, since there's no homework this summer, I shall gather my discipline by losing weight, eating healthier, and reading.

Tomorrow I shall call the school, and go on a bike ride.

If I don't, I shall punish myself somehow. No restaurant city! O:

I got a library card to spite my father today.

2009-06-16T23:13:00.000-07:00

And I spent a good portion of the day at Kayla's, making a lip-synching video of "Think About It," by the BEST band ever, Flight of the Conchords.
You may view it on her blog, @ thepearlstation1.blogspot.com

I'm really... hating him right now. Seriously. He and Judi are best buds, and she's the bad child! She can get away with an underage DUI, but I get in trouble for parking the car on the grass. How was I supposed to know the car is leaking oil? Maybe instead of scolding me you should go get it fixed so I don't get punished for doing what Mom does on a daily basis!

I went to the dentist today. It was awful, mostly because I was inverted and it felt like I was drowning in my own ...phlegm. Such a gross word. D: But the dentist herself is nice, great, and I like having good, healthy teeth.

I'm going to read Eat, Pray, Love by Elizabeth Gilbert, even though I haven't the slightest idea of what's it about. I hear it is an amazing book.

Goodnight stars, goodnight sky,
Goodnight Steven, goodnight Pi.
Goodnight flowers, goodnight guy,
Goodnight Mediterranean Fruit Fly.

I'll become a great poet someday. ;)

(: Great mood!

2009-06-14T21:19:00.000-07:00

Sorry for the negative-ness of the post the other night. I was frustrated and upset because NONE of the Saldaña family came to my graduation or dinner afterwards, and some of the excuses were stupid. ): But I had a great time anyway! Wooh! I'm a graduate! :)))

So, I went shopping with Kayla downtown/hillcrest today. (: I had a great time; she's the best shopping partner. And it just so happened that Urban Outfitters had a great sale going on! a bunch of dresses, skirts, and shirts for under $30! And also I got three shirts from Buffalo Exchange. (: I'm really happy with all I got (two dresses, the most beautiful skirt in the world, 5 or 6? shirts, a pair of flip-flops - All for just under $200!) and it's exciting actually liking my clothes! (:

So, I'm in a great mood. Also, we did a LOT of walking (parked a good mile away from UO) so I'm all "excercised" and cheerful. It sucks, though, because Kayla wasn't feeling well. I'm glad she went anyway.

I hope you guys all had a good day too! (:

I'm superexcited for going shopping.

2009-06-14T12:13:00.001-07:00

That's new.
I think I finally figured out, too, why I now care what I wear.
This happens to most people by the time they're 12. This happened to me at maybe 16 and it's still kind of going strong: The desire to look good.
The desire to dress nicely.

The thing is, most kid get to pick out their clothes when they're young. Like, before 3rd grade. Right?
My dad stopped picking out my clothes in 6th grade. >:l I still despise him a little for that.
And, right after 6th grade, I had to wear uniforms to school! So then I technically didn't get to pick out my clothes.
9th grade comes and finally I get to wear whatever I want.
I think there's a "sinking in" period for picking out your own clothes. A couple years, maybe. So, while most people start picking out their own clothes in early-mid elementary school and therefore develop their own sense of style by the time middle school rolls around, I start truly picking out my own clothes in 9th grade and therefore am now obsessed with fashion.

I'm going shopping today. (:

I wish I was all excited and happy and nostalgic.

2009-06-12T15:23:00.000-07:00

My family (aunts and uncles, etc) aren't coming tonight. My dad isn't coming tonight.
Everyone else has family who flew in from other states to see them graduate.
My family from San Diego is all too busy to drive down to IB for an hour.
My dad wouldn't even take the day off work.

Fuck. You. All.

Stop squishing your bugs!

2009-06-11T22:05:00.000-07:00

Bugs are not all nasty, gross, icky, scary beings!

How would you feel if you got trampled?!

This summer is going to be a good one.

2009-06-09T14:46:00.000-07:00

This is my summer. This will be a good summer. This summer will be better than the rest!

I will make it good.

Hahaha!

2009-06-08T13:11:00.001-07:00

Mom is getting mad at me for getting annoyed with Judi.

2009-06-08T11:58:00.000-07:00

She needs to bathe. That doesn't just affect Judi. That affects me, too. Remember, Mom? You aren't the one sharing a room with her.
She needs to go to the dentist and start brushing her teeth. That affects me because Judi talks to me.
She needs to clean her room because it's my room too and things in our closet don't hang anymore. They "hang" about two feel and then they lay.
She needs to lose weight because otherwise she'll die young. That definitely affects me.

I think Mom is in denial because Mom is the same way. Living in a mess, sometimes bathing, half a mouth of teeth, overweight...

WARNING:

2009-06-07T13:56:00.001-07:00

Sweatpants decrease productivity.

How To Write a Thank You Card

2009-06-06T09:18:00.000-07:00

My mom sent out graduation announcements to a lot of people I have met once or twice, and also to second-cousins and great aunts and such. I feel guilty, because after one week I have received a check for $25 from my Great Aunt Therese and a $20 Target card from... Therese and Tom Ryan? I apparently met her three years ago at one of my mom's meetings. D: I don't like receiving gifts from people I KNOW! And to now be receiving gifts from people I don't know?!

But, to be polite, I'm sending them thank you cards, so they kind of get something in return. Plus, it's always polite to send thank you cards when you receive gifts. So, here's how you do it!

1. Start with a formal-ish greeting: Dear Aunt Therese,

2. Say thank you! and for what. Thank you for the sweet card and the check for $25 dollars.

3. Say how you're going to use it, where you're going to put it, etc, and since mine was a response for a graduation announcement I figured she should know what I'm doing next: I'm going to be attending San Diego state in the fall, and this money will definitely come in handy when I need to buy text books!

4. Say thank you again.

Love/from/etc, Rosie.

(If they have a nickname for you, like how I'm Rosie to all my family, write that on the inside of the card. However, when you address is, put just your name. Rose. And don't write Aunt Therese on the address either. Names.)

I can't believe it! I'm FREE!

2009-06-06T09:01:00.000-07:00

I am officially out of high school, mostly. I still have to go back almost every day next week for something or another, but no more classes!

It's so exciting, but it's such a big change. I'm so excited to be done with high school; it's like a heavy burden taken off my back! But now there's Collegeland that I'm going to be attending in the fall, which is like they took off the High School burden and added a much heavier Collegeland one. I just want to be free!

I'm so nervous, though. I have poor discipline! I don't know how I'm going to survive next year in school. Teachers aren't going to baby me, or give me pity grades. The counselors aren't going to schedule all my classes for me, and I'm not just going to be at school from 7:30 to 3:40 every day. I'll probably have an assortment of times for classes. And I'll actually have to do all my homework. On time. My professors won't feel bad for me because my mom was recently diagnosed with cancer, they aren't going to "let it slide" if I don't go to my classes because I'm out of town or something.

I've tried using planners to keep myself scheduled, but they never work. I never remember to open them again, I guess. I'd always write down all my homework in the beginning of the school year, and when I got home I'd head straight to the computer and literally not remember to look in the planner to see what homework I have to do.

I'm going to have to care.

I guess this is partly why I'm glad I'm staying at home: I'm not going to have to worry about everything. No rent to pay, or no worries about feeding myself. Just worry about school this year.

Gosh.

A weight lifted off my shoulders.... only to be replaced by a much heavier one.

Mr. Barker's motivational speaking is great.

2009-06-03T20:48:00.000-07:00

He should charge for it.

Basically, the moral of his long story about how sometimes life sucks and how you really just need to keep going, taking baby steps, is that when placed in a tough situation you are able to do at least a little something. Even if your girlfriend dumped you and you can't pay your rent, you can still go take your dog out for a walk.

So, basically, even if you can't do the big things immediately, or everything seems to be falling apart, you can still do the little things.

And, I don't know if it's a temporary thing, but what he said and how he said it really hit me. So I was all motivated-ish today.

And I bought a new pair of shorts and black cargos. I'm not a big fan of J.C. Penny, but when Mom gives you $40, you can't really go pants shopping at Macy's.
Plus, the pants at Shimmer are as tight as leggings. Yet they still somehow fit fine. Don't feel tight, just look like denim tights. O:

Two more school days.

Today wasn't a great day.

2009-05-31T20:36:00.000-07:00

Not that it was particularly bad. But I have eaten everything in sight, and I drank three cans of soda.
Gah.
And I've been complaining about my recent weight gain. D:
I am almost done with one essay which means I only have two left. D:

Slap me in the face. Please please please.

Rosie the Riveter - Redone

2009-05-30T13:03:00.000-07:00

Gosh, how I miss Gilmore Girls. Alexis Bledel.

Mom had surgery today!

2009-05-29T21:12:00.001-07:00

And everything went according to plan! we left the hospital around 6ish; Mom was feeling fine but very tired.

The tumor has been removed! (: Now, let's start worrying about the kidney again...

I graduate from high school in two weeks! (:

I taught my uncle how to play Pokemon! Diamond! for the DS today.

Mom got flowers.

My garlic has sprouted! Little green leaf-stick thing! (: And I have 3 tomato plants that have sprouted! My marigolds were succesfully transplanted from the kitchen windowsill to my "garden" out in my 4x1 plot in the backyard.

I have a date with Steven tomorrow in Old Town! Gonna walk around then go out for dinner. (:

I have to write a number of essays this weekend as well.

Hope y'all are doing fine!

I want this shirt:

2009-05-27T20:06:00.001-07:00

I need, like, 300$ to go shopping.
I still say it's unfair that all these years Judi has gotten much more than $100 limit, and I've been tight on the $100 every year.
She never even wears half the clothes she's bought. Seriously! Clothes she has with tags still on! >:l

Book Review: The Absolutely True Diary of a Part-Time Indian

2009-05-14T21:59:00.000-07:00

by Sherma Alexie.

I give it 4.5 stars. Now, that might sound generous. But let me exlain:

It had sad parts. It had unexpected sad parts. It seemed realistic, how the sad things worked.
It also had good parts, some that were just stupid funny, some that were cute-funny, and some that were make-your-heart-feel-good happy.

The plot? A poor, 14 year-old Indian Reservation kid who ends up going to a school in rich, small-town Reardan. He is the only Indian kid in that school (which is 22 miles away!). Struggles with racism and such, and with "traitor" problems with the kids from "the rez." I think that part seemed real because it seemed mostly realistic. Only a few too-cheesy parts. And the main part was realistic. and I think most people can relate. Most peopple have, at some point, been the new kid or the outcast, or something of the like. So I think it was a good book.

Very good book!

I just want to talk.

2009-05-08T21:54:00.000-07:00

I have so much to say. And I want to say it all over and over again. I'm so...

I'm overwhelmed.

Steven's mom gave my mom flowers.
It was nice but my mom feels bad.

Jenny said I shouldn't worry too much, but then that statistic said the tumors are almost always malignant.

I don't like Mom' computer. I want my own again. I don't like nothaving aim or firefox or automatic spellcheck on blogger. I can't figure out how to type on this one. I rarely used to have typos. Now theyre perpetual.

The only ting cool about it is the fingerprint swiper. I don't have to actually type in any passwords or usernames or anything for logins. Just swipe! and I'm logged on. To everything. Convenient.

I need to shower and shave. First communion tomorrow for the little ones and I have to dress up. Dress nicely.

Gosh. Golly.

I'm overwhelmed. I need to cry.
I wish Steven was here, right now.

Gosh.

2009-05-08T21:19:00.000-07:00

From http://www.urologyinstitute.com/html/bladder_cancer.html

Q. Are all bladder tumors malignant (cancerous)?
Dr. Green: No; however, 90% are.

I'm so nervous. She should be fine. We hope she is fine. But I can't help worry.

My Mom.

2009-05-08T14:26:00.000-07:00

She has a tumor. In her bladder. Could be cancerous. Could be benign.

She has no functioning right kidney. Most likely. More testing will be done, but it would be a miracle if it was doing ANYTHING other than floating around in there. It is a rock. They will most likely remove the kidney entirely. If it is functioning more than 20-ish percent, they'll try to blast the stone into "passable" pieces.

The staghorn kidney stone has basically sucked all the life out f the kidney. It has shrunk around the stone. The stone is in every little bit of the kidney. It has been there a verrrry looooong time. The kidney is not normal sized. The left one is fine. The right one is significantly smaller than it should be. Significantly. (I got to see the CT-SCAN and it really is noticably smaller.)

She will be getting a cystoscopy (where they basically shave the tumor away) and while they do that, I guess, they will be doing a biopsy to tell whether it is cancerous, and they'll also be able to tell whether or not it has overly affected the tissue of the bladder.

If it has gotten deep into the bladder's muscle tissue, they will likely have to take out the bladder.
She won't have a bladder.

There are a couple things they can do. They can send a tube (made of intestine!) from her ureters to an external stoma, which will rlease her urine into a collecting pouch.* They can make a small internal "Bladder" from intestine as well as a tube to a stoma, and they put a catheter into the stoma to release the bladder's fluids. They can make a full-on new bladder and have her go to the bathroom like normal, but that is the highest-risk option.

Lots of scheduling to be done. Lots of tests. Lots of worry.

I'm really worried. My mom is too.
She's getting all teary-ish. She was telling me today, rather grimly, "I want to see you get married, graduate from college, I want to see your children."

It was....
It was depressing.

*My grandma had a similar pouch-type thing and a stoma because she had colon cancer and couldn't go number 2 regularly. She had a pouch.

So much going on.

2009-05-03T20:27:00.000-07:00

My mom has a staghorn kidney stone (google image it- they are HORRIBLE D: ) and some unknown "foreign mass" around her bladder. They need surgery for the stone and testing and such for the bladder "mass." I'm really worried. So is she.

Judi got a DUI yesterday. My 20-year-old sister. Gosh. I'm so.... I don't know what to say at all. I've been venting all day. Happened last night/this morning. She HAD to give Cynthia a ride home... Nice going.

I'm going to SDSU in exchange for a car. New car. Although with all this drama, I'm selfishly worried that I'm not going to get my car. Or any real freedom.

Dad is hardly punishing her! I'm so mad about it! She's not getting so much as yelled at by him! All he did? - "Alcohol is calories!" so he's going to work her out soo much.
And she's expecting to be able to drive over to her friend's house to pick up her iPod. Dad's probably going to let her keep driving. That's bull crap.

AP tests start this week. My grades aren't great and I need to pump up the workage in Spanish and Physics. I'm not too worried about the gov't test or my grade in that class, and same with literature. I'm worried about the calculus test and, obviously the physics test but I'm mostly uncaring about that one. I knew it was a lost cause in December. But I'm content about nearly everything so yeah.

I'm worried about my mom (and my mom's sanity after Judi's stupidity) but I'm hoping for the best. I'm kind of upset with my dad's underreaction right now. He yelled at me this morning for not picking my clothes up off the bathroom floor and for not doing my dishes last night, while his other daughter had to be picked up, ticketed and arrested for a friggin underage DUI which's fines will be HUUUGE! and he's preoccupied being mad about one saucepan and one plate. >:l

I bought new shorts and a pretty shirt, so I'm I guess more happy than not.
Wish me luck on the test tomorrow!

Good day today, shopping with Kayla then Dr. Cole's chilli party.

Not much to say.

2009-04-14T18:03:00.001-07:00

Falling behind.
Falling far, far behind.

I want to skip school and college and work and life until I'm a 65 year old billionaire retired on my private island.

I want to retire. And I haven't even started my life yet.

Long time, no write.

2009-03-19T19:56:00.000-07:00

Not much new here with me. Annoying family, Academic League, Band festivals, and getting my license!

We won our match today against Sweetwater; we got superiors at both of our band festival; and I only missed 9 out of 15 on my driving test.

Otherwise, all's quiet on the western front.

Carla tried out for the school play. Hopefully she made it but I have no idea.

I really liked The Importance of Being Earnest; I thought it was hilarious.

Julissa officially walks perfectly and turned 1 on the fifth.

And I'm about 1/3rd of the way done with health.

Spanish has been damn near traumatic. Watching idiots be idiots iss literally stressful to me, especially when the most stupid one is the sub. Don't get me wrong, she seemed nice. She just didn't seem like a high school sub. She seemed like she'd be perfect with a goup of 5 year olds.

Judi is being a total brat. She borrowed Steven's Oswald coffee mug a few weeks back, promising she'd get it back and cleaned before we even got home that same day. Three weeks later, I'm running late and in desperate need of coffee, and the mug is nowhere to be found. When she finally cleaned it, a week later, she washed it horribly.

Next case? She had a bottle of apple juice. I love apple juice! My favorite drink, probably. We never have it at the house. But she was drinking out of the bottle (one of those big bottles, too) with her disgusting mouth. And a week later, she hadn't touched it anymore. I asked her if she planned to dump it and she said she would on Wednesday (trash day), not that it made a difference what day she did it. A week later, it started growing mold yet still sat on the kitchen table. And that was two weeks ago. I have mentioned it to her 4 times now, and each time except the first she has yelled at me to stop bringing it up.

Gar. Obviously, my problems aen't that serious. But to me they are plenty bothersome.

Oh. Ad SDSU won't give me any money. Just 14k in loans. =/

2009-02-28T22:09:00.000-08:00

I am going to be a good person.

I will not talk down to other people. I will try not to think negatively of others, and I will keep my opinions to myself or my close ring of friends.

I will do things that need to be done. I will do them on time and with good quality.

I will stop complaining so damn much. Complaining takes too much energy anyway. And the time it takes to complain could be better put to use fixing whatever the complaint is about.

I will spend less time thinking and more time doing. Not like thinking is bad. But I have a habit of trying to literally learn skills like organizing from reading about how to do it. Instead of just doing it.

I will be a better friend.

And I will take better care of myself.

I need to be writing my "resume" for Spanish.

2009-02-19T19:36:00.000-08:00

But screw that. I'm planning on writing something ridiculous like I used to be a matador or something similar. Lion tamer. President. Astronaut. I think it would be fun.

I'm slowly but surely losing weight, in small amounts. My pilates DVD is vicious. Makes my stomach feel good, though. In a weird way.

Academic league! Lost today and lost on Tuesday, but today I answered a question! Last night I got a medal, and today I got an acceptance letter. I'm feeling smart.

I answered a bonus question, all three parts, and got us five points! (Not usually a lot, but since we only had like 10 points in total at the end... my five points were a big deal!) They were all music-related questions, so it made sense that I knew them. I also knew a few more answers, which was good, but on one I buzzed in late, and the others I wasn't in yet. But I finally feel like I should be in there.

I got the medal for getting second place in my GPA category for Academic League, the essay. I got 780-ish points for my essay (out of 1000) and that was second place of the "Varsity" group. I wasn't too amazed or anything at the time, but I am pretty glad now that I think of it. It still surprises me that my essays are good; they don't seem special to me, and I always feel like I could have done so much better. Or, for example in English classes, I can read a classmate's paper and it seems at least as good as mine, yet they get significantly lower scores.

And I was accepted into SDSU! I mean, it makes sense since I'm part of the Compact for Success, but it's still exciting. I really think I'm going to go to Northridge, though. Kayla and I are going to live together in an apartment, maybe I'll get a job, and all will be well. Quite honestly, I think that college will do me good. I'm irresponsible and don't keep busy, I waste time so much, and I feel like I'm not a worthy person, I guess. I think college will help shape me into a better person. Not like I'm really relying on that; I still plan on trying to change. I just think college will help catalyze my much-needed improvement.

I need to start the damn "resume"-like essay.

I've been sick the past week-ish, and I think I'm better but still sniffling constantly. Did you know they make non-viral Kleenex? They make all types of special tissues. Lotiony, tissues with Vick's, non-viral?! That's so nifty, in a way.

Dear Potential Employer,

You should hire me for the babysitter/nanny position because I am very qualified. I am brave and good at working under great pressure, as my past experience as a bullfighter will show. I am also very responsible. My reference from the CEO of McDonalds will show you that I am great with money, as I am former treasurer of McDonalds and I was also very reliable and prompt.

I should be a great babysitter because, despite the fact that I am no good with children, I am wonderful with cats. I spend most of my time volunteering at the animal shelter, and I have six cats of my own.

Please consider me for the position.

Hahaha.

Product Review: Smooth-Away Pads

2009-02-15T20:47:00.000-08:00

I have been seeing those infomercials for these Smooth Away pads for quite some time, and my mom and I have both been very curious to see if they would work, and work painlessly like the commercial suggests. So, today while we were at Target I spotted them there, for only $9.99 for the pack of five big pads and five small pads. I figured 10$ wasn't so much that I'd be mad if they didn't work, and curiosity got the best of me. I bought them.

When we got into the car I lifted my pant-leg, got out the little pink, rubbery Smooth-Away and the little pad and started rubbing. I sort of expected the little pads to feel like smooth sand-paper, or maybe feel like a nail file, except toned down.

Nope. Smooth as a nail-buffer. And does it work? Pretty well. The hairs are all gone in some places and really, really short in others. Maybe not what you want to use when you anticipate getting touched, but useful if you're just going for "It's hot out but I don't have time to shave my hairy legs and want to wear shorts."

And it doesn't hurt at all. It's perfectly smooth. It does leave your legs very ashy on the surface, but that is easily fixed with a little rubbing off and lotion.

The package says that you should only use it on dry skin, not wet or damp or lotiony.

I think I give it 4 stars. Like I said, it doesn't get as close as a shave, but it's surprisingly affective. And since I found it for $9.99, and it seems like each pad will last at least a few uses, it seems well worth my money.

I wish I played drums a little better.

2009-02-12T19:02:00.001-08:00

(Picture taken from Flickr.com)

I never really think about it. We sound good, so why should I? But compare us to some other bands, maybe from other districts, counties, states. Are we as good as I think? Probably not.

Though maybe it makes sense? A 30 piece band with people playing their not-preferred instruments (Israel with Clarinet, Daniel with Trombone), and only semi-serious musicians, versus a bunch of schools with harcore musicians who breathe scales and (haha) have to play something in order to get their allowance or something ridiculous like that. But we never realize how we sound, compared to others.

I remember at one festival last year, the drummers walked out of the warm up room and we sounded amazing. But in there, we didn't sound great at all. Maybe it has to do with being at a distance?

But then that doesn't necessarily make sense either. When we were in the audience at festivals, we could tell when the performing bands screwed up.

Oh well.
I just think it's weird how we're maybe the best in the district (or at least up there) and yet, if we compared us to other bands, we suck.

First Academic League match!

2009-02-12T18:47:00.000-08:00

I didn't answer any questions. I had one, a math one, but I thought I did it wrong. And then time ran out. It was asking for the Y-coordinate of a certain function, and I got the answer but thought that the -b/2a was for the X... but I was right. D:
And we beat Montgomery by, well, a landslide. 63, was it? to 9. Wooh! And the JV was a close game, a very exciting one. Down to the last question! And we won! And it was my first game, so it was especially exciting. But amusingly, we had to ride a short bus. Academic Leaguers on the special bus, pretty funny. And we had to cram three people in a few of the seats, instead of the usual 2. I talked to this guy Gus who I was good friends with in elementary school, but haven't talked to much since like 6th grade.

Steven is pretty sick. He woke up feeling like he had to throw up. Doctor said it's either really bad food poisoning or some sort of virus. I'm hoping it's not, like, salmonella or something, because he thinks it's from these peanu butter cracker things that are a little expired that he ate at my house. If that's the case, I might have gotten it by kissing him. Oh, yeah. That. No kissing! It's Valentine's Day weekend! No kissing?!
We still, hopefully, have plans. I'm going to his house tomorrow, we're going to Vons, and then we're going to cook the family dinner. Steak and potatoes!

And then Carla's birthday party is Saturday at, I believe, three. Steven and I still need to buy her present. Hopefully they sell cookbooks at Vons? Theoretically, they should, being a grocery store.

I want to dance. Like, do a full on dance routine or something. Except for the fact that I'm feeling sick, though that could be due to mild hypochondria. Maybe I just think that, since Steven is sick, I'm sick. Or maybe I have exactly what he does.

I think I'm going to go lay down. I just ate for basically the first time all day. I'm tired of watching Nick, but nothing else is on. So I think I'll just lay in my warm bed and play online.

I hope I don't have what Steven has. And I hope he feels better soon. I think he's going back to the doctor's tonight, and hopefully they can tell him exactly what is wrong.

True Jackson, VP, sucks.

I have been feeling really lonely.

2009-02-11T19:43:00.000-08:00

And I don't know what it is, but the past week or so I have been mildly miserable. Obviously not while people are around, but the minute I am away from friends, I'm so miserable.

Steven and I were talking today, about this, and I starting talking about Jackie and Ambrose, and quite frankly I miss them. Both of them. Even Ambrose. Because, though I feel like I can say I have a best friend, it isn't the same as when I practically lived with Jackie. And since Ambrose came into my life shortly after Jackie did, (and left perfectly proportionally afterward) I miss him accordingly. Plus, his life was so screwed up, I liked being his confidant. Steven has nothing to share, really. No emotions, nothing ever goes wrong, nothing ever super-excites him (obviously, that's all exaggerating) and I think the fact that Ambrose and I never saw each other, and talked to each other also relatively sparsely, he was able to confide more in me.

Not like I don't know everything about Steven, but it seems like he has less to tell me than Ambrose did. Nothing seems as significant because I witness it all, I get a constant play-by-play. And I wouldn't give that up. It's just not the same. Better, just not the same.

And, like I said, I practically lived at Jackie's house. We were with each other 24/7. We called both our moms "Mom." And this happened forever ago! But all of a sudden it's all coming back and I miss it.

And I miss having such a large group of friends. You were never alone, you always had someone to talk to. And now it's just me, Kayla, Steven, and Carla. And Carla seems as though she would be close to me, but in reality there's a lot she doesn't know about me. And Kayla knows me so much, yet we don't hang out very often. So it just feels lonely.

Yeah. That's it. I'm lonely.

I'm happy, and of course not lonely, when I'm with people. But the minute it's just me, I'm so lonely. I can't do anything. I'm depressed. That's it.

What excites you the most about moving out?

2009-02-09T18:24:00.001-08:00

Me, personally, I can not wait to start creating a collection of kitchen tools and cookbooks. And all other things houseware-ish, such as bathroom towels, coasters, curtains and the like.

It sounds terribly dorky, right? But that is realkly what I spend a good portion of my time thinking about. What color do I want in my bathroom? What colors are unusual but pretty in a kitchen? What lampshade would go best with that lamp?

Yeah. A true nerd, right?

But I really can't wait. I'm sure my first imaginary paycheck will go to clothing, but I'm certain that shortly after that I will start buying omelet pans (and I don't like omelets!) and measuring cups galore.

Of course, the idea of getting away from the family will be great. Only, what, six more months or so to go!
And I love how I get so excited about all these "Only 6 more months" reminders, but really. Think back six months. So recently, right? You know exactly what you were doing! It feels like yesterday! Time really fucking flies like a clock on a jet.

I want to start wearing makeup. I know it doesn't make a big difference, and I probably look the same without it, but looking at, for example, celebrities without make-up... wow! When you look at them with, it doesn't usually look like they have a lot on. But when you look without, it's a big difference.

I need to work out tonight, probably just walking on wiifit and yoga before bed. I should also fold my clothes, and Piggy needs a clean cage soon. And the damn FAFSA... D:

Apples and peanut butter are great together. Lay off the ruffles.

These usually just annoy me, but this one seems amusing.

2009-02-09T17:17:00.000-08:00

Rules:
Go to urbandictionary. com and type in your answers to the following questions.

Post the first definition it gives you.

1.
Your name?
Rose

A flower that comes in a lot more colors than just yellow or red. They also come in pink, violet, black, white, cream, maroon, orange, red shades, and multicolors, which are usually a mix of white and some other color. They also have miniature roses, which come in the same colors, only they are about a quarter of the size of actual roses. Some roses grow on bushes, some grow on vines. Others grow on 4-foot tall trees. There are single bloom roses, which have less petals than the more widely known double-bloom roses. Roses are often given to people you care about.

They smell pretty too.

2.
Your age?
17
The right age to start having sex, according to Chef on South Park
Chef: "The right time to start havin
g sex is 17."
Sheila: "So you mean 17 as long as you're in love?"
Chef: "Nope,
just 17."
Gerald: "But what if you're not ready at 17?"
Chef: "17, you're ready
."

3.
One of your friends?
A beautiful female who is slightly goofy and really crazy in all areas of her life; never forgotten and always lovable.

The girl I went out with last night was such a Kayla, but for some reason she hasn't called me back; I even paid for her dinner!

4.
What should you be doing?
Homework (Noun)
A punishment given to students by evil teachers after the students have already put in 7 hours of hard labor

5.
Favorite color?
Green

yes... it is most definitely referring to the marijuana... and also, upon occassion, any substance with similar uses. too, properly, of course, it is a golfing term, but that;s really not very much fun, now is it?

'yo, where da green at?'

6.
Birthplace?
San Diego
Best. City. Ever.

7.
Month of your birth?
October

NUDY MAGAZINE DAY!

- what day is it?
- ...october...

(go watch billy madison)

8.
Last person you talked to?
Dad
The parent that takes the most shit. Sure, if you had a shitty father, then go ahead and bitch, but not all of us did. Some of us had great fathers, who really loved us, and weren't assholes. Honestly, if you could see how much damage a mother could do to one's self esteem, you wouldn't even place so much blame on "dear old dad"

9.
One of your nicknames?
Pumps

High heels

thse bitches wearin 9 inch stileto pumps

Bleh.

2009-02-08T11:28:00.000-08:00

Steven's being ridiculous.

I had a lot of fun with Kayla. We made lumpia. I went to sleep really early. But I had a fun night. And Kayla's bed is so comfy, I slept wonderfully.

Apparently I lost three pounds, I'm sure due to the unintentional starvation. I have had like nothing to eat the past few days, like how yesterday the burrito was covered in crap.

I'm feeling really apathetic. Is that the right word? Not good, not bad. Just bleh. Somewhere perfectly in the middle. Almost emotionless.

I'm so tired of watching Nickelodeon.

And I'm so tired.
Goodnight.

Babies.

2009-02-07T18:19:00.001-08:00

Seems like everyone is pregnant, or has been pregnant recentishly.

Apparently Zander's sister is pregnant. Crazy, to me. I only met her once though.

Judi was so irritating today. First, this morning she didn't suggest at all that we're leaving until, mid-Breakfast, she asks "Are you ready?" while I'm sitting there, coffee-less, cranky, with half a piece of peanut butter toast in my hand and the rest of it jammed in my mouth.

Decathlon, I told her I'd let her know when I'm ready because I wasn't sure if it was over at 3 or 4.

3:45 I get out, call her. No answer, which is weird because her phone is perpetually in her hand, and if she's driving she usually puts it on speaker at least. I called her again, thinking that maybe she'd pick up. No answer. Called home, twice, Jesse answered. Judi is out looking at cars with Cynthia. It is 3:53. One more call, leave a message. Made it urgent. It was raining and my boots and socks were soaked, face wind-chilled. Texted her, angrily. Go ask April for a ride. Text Judi, saying "Forget it, April is giving me a ride." Get a phone call, it's Judi. "I'm right across the street about to turn. I'm here."

Have to climb over the baby to get in. Judi went car-shopping in Mom's van (remember the scratch incident? Judi isn't allowed to have Mom's car except when she's driving me somewhere). She went to McDonalds. It is 3:55, I haven't eaten all day. But they just went to McDonalds.

Steven's not talking. Not intentionally not talking. Just, literally, preoccupied, I guess?

Decathlon... My score was decent. Ashamed of the speech, but not surprised. Sad about the interview; thought I did wonderfully. Azia did better than me at Music. Rained off and on; boots got soaked.

Kayla's tonight? Two people party? After we drive out to national city for lumpia.

My hands are freezing.

Lame day, I think, is the verdict. Please get better. 5.5 hours left to impress me, Day.

I'm trying to lose weight.

2009-02-05T19:18:00.000-08:00

I've been feeling really fat lately.

And there has been mild drama with Steven, not really in such a bad way, about the possibility of me leaving San Diego, because I'm fairly certain I don't want to stay here any more. I'll come back after college.

Saturday is Decathlon. I'm worried and nervous; I haven't studied at all.

Mr. Garchie was ridiculous. Making an AP senior class read aloud? And we aren't even that far in the book?!! Gah!

Kayla has been sick. School has felt lonely.

Carla's birthday is coming up. I think I'm going to get her this cupcake book. She likes baking. And she likes all things cute. So, cup-cake book seems perfect.

I've been really tired lately. And it has been hard to pay attention in classes. I can't think of a particular reason, which makes it irritating. Just been really tired.

I want to be beautiful, but I feel awkward. I'm awkward in so many ways. I think the worst way is that I'm socially awkward. I have a really hard time making friends. I think it has to do with my aversion towards people. And too many things annoy me, too many traits. But I wish I wasn't so awkward.

I seem kinda down, rereading this blog. I'm not really unhappy. There's nothing wrong. There's just nothing right, really.

Happy belated groundhog day! Carla seems to think that Steven is going to do something for me for Valentine's Day, but I really doubt it.
And Dad is okay with Steven going to Vegas with us during spring break! It depends on when/how long Jenny is going to be in town during Spring break, because obviously that's first priority. But it would be so cool if he could come! Obviously, we wouldn't be able to share a room, but it would still be fun. Vegas is no longer entertaining, but I think taking other people around to sight-see and do all the fun things over again would make it fun.

Just a random note: Andrew Garret reminds me of Alan Harper from Two and a Half Men. Anyone else know who I'm talking about? See the similarities?

I'm tired. Good night!~

Oh! I learned how to write my first name in Japanese! It's a square thingy and a t mixed with an h!

I have a weird craving for some pasta and carrots.

2009-01-31T14:11:00.000-08:00

Church was fun today. The kids did a project where they copied down the ten commandments, and while they were doing that, Carla's mom took me on the church tour with her class. It was fun, going through the church and hearing all the stories of what this stands for and this is here because and so on and so forth. And the little kids (5th and 6th grade?) seemed to think it was fun, too.

I was planning on going to Steven's today but mom wants to go shopping. My black bra somehow ripped in half, assumedly during the wash, so I'm sucked in to shopping too. I really just want to go to Steven's though.

I finally found my long lost, favorite nail polish (Judi knew where it was. I should have just asked before.) and I'm so happy. (: I kind of want to start wearing makeup, but Steven thinks I look better without it. He's also learning how to give proper feedback it seems (Your hair looks good like that). Dad forgot that he was supposed to be getting me a job.

Working concessions is tiring. I just want to sleeeeep.

Zzzzz. Good day, all.

I worked concessions at the game today.

2009-01-28T20:25:00.001-08:00

And gosh are my legs tired.
I have new found respect for all y'all with jobs. And Ms. P can be intimidating! I learned how to use a cash register but I had trouble with 'subtotal' so I just added it in my head. I don't get the subtotal. I did it the way Izzy taught me and a lady's $9.50 came out to 14.00! How?! And 3.25 managed to be 5.00. Made me feel a little better when Izzy had trouble with it too.
By the way, my dad is trying to get me a part time job as a hostess at 1500. I'd be getting pretty good money (he says like $10/hr starting out, but I'd be fine with minimum wage) as well as tipes from some of the more generous rich people (You got my coat out of the closet? Here's ten bucks!) but he also said that the younger, less senior waiters are horrible to the hostesses; they take all their aggression out on the hostesses. But I need to grow a tough skin anyway, right?! But I don't have any job interview clothes. All I have are jeans, pj's, and tees. I'm not going to go to a job interview for the singlemost expensive restaurant in San Diego county in a Beatles tee and crummy jeans. So, I'd have to go out and buy nice clothes, well as black slacks and white button-ups.

I'm muy excited about school. I love the fact that it's almost over with but I hate the fact that I still need to take health somehow. I can't do SOS because of my (two) 7th periods. They wouldn't let me take it independently through Learning Center. I'm really happy that I got into college. I'm even more happy that Kayla got into CSUN, knowing that it was her first choice. I'm so happy for her, and it also makes me kind of want to go there too.

My space bar is screwed up. I took it off to fix it, but it didn't help. My "K" is also messed up; whenever I type the letter "I," "K" comes with it, so it's like ik.

Shower time shortly.

I love you, blog. Since I got you, I have exploded at my family much less.
However, it is still unavoidable. I almost had to walk home from the game because Judi was watching Baby and didn't get the carseat. Yet when I get home (after Steven calls his dad) Cynthia's car is here, which obviously had the carseat.
Why couldn't you have said "I can come get you shortly since Cynthia will be here soon and I'll have the carseat/ won't be caring for Julissa anymore" ?
She was then mad at me for being upset. So I brought up how Judi freaked out over the water, so I have every right to have a hissy fit once in a while. She says I do it much more than she does, yet Judi has been throwing fits much more often (twice in two days).

Bleh. I'm getting off now. Spacebar is too annoying. Peace, love, and rock and roll. Good night.

P.S. Y'all complain about me not writing often enough, yet you two stop when I start? >:l

The Dress I Want for Prom

2009-01-27T20:21:00.000-08:00

Something like this. I suppose I could figure out how to make this, but I would want to try making something else first, something with a little less pressure. Though my unused, 6 year old sewing machine has been itching to be used, especially lately. Maybe I should do it some justice.

I swear, I'm going to fold my laundry tonight! After I do yoga, after my shower.

On the topic of yoga, my iTunes is, like, deleting my old podcasts? Sometime last week I did episode 24 or whatever of the yoga podcast I've subscried to, and when I went to use it two nights ago, it was gone! How annoying!
And then, this morning I set my alarm half an hour early so I could do yoga and still have time for breakfast, and episode two, Sun Salutations was gone. Gone! Just gone! Yet again, how annoying! Half an hour of comfy, warm sleep lost to simply trying to open iTunes (took five minutes for it to open), downloading the podcast, and then going on myspace because I didn't have twenty spare minutes left anymore. Argh.

Judi got in a fight with Cynthia, I suppose. Well, I don't suppose. Judi said they did. But when Mom asked her what was the fight about, Judi got irritated and responded with a curt "Nothing."

Have you ever heard the sone High School Never Ends by, I think, Bowling for Soup? (Not sure if it's them.) Well, it's true, I guess. Judi's 20, Cynthia is a mommy and still they argue about immature crap.

I wish everyone was perfect. >:l

It's really irritating that

2009-01-27T17:41:00.000-08:00

Mom feels the need to be in everyone's business. I can't think of any examples, but all the time she does it. Dad will be talking to Judi about something unimportant and irrelevant to my mother, and yet Mom will chime in with "What?" Needing to hear it all.

It's annoying.

Izzy and Cynthia think I look like Blair from Gossip Girl. I don't watch the show, but I've seen the girl, and I don't get it. I remind them of her, yet I look nothing like her, dress nothing like her, and definitely act nothing like her. (I started watching an episode today to see who she was, and within 5 minutes she was getting laid. Yeah. Not me, thank you.)

Judi made meatloaf.

Have a good day.

2009-01-26T21:38:00.001-08:00

Doing yoga before bed feels so good.

But then I damn near fall a sleep on the living room floor.

Note to self: Start brushing your teeth before yoga. That way you don't have to do it after, you can go straight to bed.

Zzz. Zzz. Zzzzz.

Sweet dreams.

I'm excited about college.

2009-01-26T18:54:00.000-08:00

The fact that I was accepted has really gotten me all hyped up. I'm really excited. Really really excited. And I want to go to Northridge. The slightly-far-from-home aspect really excites me. I'd miss Steven; I think that's the biggest downside. And that's a big downside. But we're both pretty okay with the idea of a longish-distance relationship. I'm not going to cheat on him. He's not going to cheat on me (and I always have Carla to make sure of that, as long as she isn't the cheat-ee!). Chances are, we won't break up. One of us would have to do something pretty bad to cause that, and that doesn't happen.
So. I'm really excited. I had my heart so set on SDSU, and now I get accepted. I don't think I really considered the school until I got in. And it's exciting. And I think I might go. Like I said, part of it is beacuse it's far away, but not overly far away. It's near a big city, but far enough away for some quiet. I think it's close enough that I wouldn't feel like a shitty girlfriend by having a long distance relationship, and I think it's the kind of far that will weed out your real friends. Who's going to talk to you once it truly takes an effort? Hmm?

I'm excited.

I'm going to college! I'm going to college! I want to jump up and down and scream and cry! I think I might!

Gosh. Golly. Jeepers! I'm so excited. I feel great. What a confidence boost.

(:

Date today.

2009-01-25T20:37:00.000-08:00

Steven and I hang out all the time, but it seems that we rarely go on full-on dates. And I don't know that today is a date by most people's standards, but to me it is.
We went to Bonita mall and spent most of the time in Border's, we had Hibachi-San teriyaki, walked all the way around the mall, walked around Target and practiced my Hula-Hoop skills, and came back to Borders for some coffee and reading.

I came back with a book called "City Chic" and, though I don't really live in the city, it is definitely an interesting 'guide.' I'm not sure I'd consider it a guide, but I don't know what else it would be. It talks mostly about living a fairly fabulous life (aimed at city life - making apartments look huge and keeping up with fashion at a discount) for less. And it has a lot of interesting tips, such as a whoe section on proper lighting, and a guide to buying furniture cheap.

I got all dolled up today - curled my hair, did my makeup, and dressed fairly nicely. My hair looked good.... at halves. I did one side, looked great, did the other side, looked great but then the original side went flat. I used enough hair spray to solidify the cast of Hairspray, haha, and still it went flat after doing and redoing both sides.
(I didn't really use that much hairspray, but my hair was pretty stiff.)

Now it's time to start that darned poetry paper. I hate analyzing poetry, and I never seem to find the meaning until I'm half done making up the essay. And then I need to fold my clothes tonight, or else it won't get done and I'll have to dig out of the clean-hamper every morning.

I love dates. I love girly-books. I love coffee - more than I know. And I love Steven. (:

Shopping!

2009-01-25T11:43:00.000-08:00

I went shopping with Kayla yesterday after a day of otherwise doing nothing.

I was supposed to go over to Steven's but "My mom is tired from taking care of Luna and she doesn't like having people over when she's tired."
So, whatever. I was mad at you anyways, but I'm over it now. Today we're going to Plaza Bonita, to eat something and wander around Borders for four hours. (: That's my kind of date.

Chente told us that Buffalo Exchange was on 6th and University. It was on 5th, and maybe midway between University and the next street over. Thanks, Chente, for making Kayla and me wander around for like half an hour along 6th.

We also went across the street to Flashbacks, and both stores were just awesome. Kayla found lots of striped things she fell in love with, and I got this amazingly pretty orange shirt and a black jacket-thing. And we saw a transvestite!

Today I need to do laundry and write a poetry thinger. Bleh. And tomorrow is a new semester.

MY LAST SEMESTER IN HIGH SCHOOL!

:D! :'( ! :'D

I'm ambivalent. I'm excited to move out and start college and get into, well, the future! But I'm also scared, and despite how crappy I feel this high school is, high school has brought about a lot of memories. A lot of friends, and fun times, and of course some not so good things (but without bad things to compare good things to, what good are good things?), and I'm going to miss things. But I hope things won't change too insanely much.

Today I helped Carla and her mom and peoples with the preschool class. They're cute! They're really cute! And for, like, 5 year olds they are really good at coloring! And cutting! I was not that good when I was little!

I need to go eat lunch, and I want to try to do my hair. Look pretty for the boyfriend. Have a good day. (: I will.

-Rose. (:

P.S.

2009-01-24T00:59:00.000-08:00

Tried salmon today. Didn't like it. Managed to swallow it, but it was not exactly prefered. Dad says I need to start out with something less fishy, like halibut or flounder. Steven said he didn't think that the fish tasted too terribly fishy, but it kind of did. And, I was right. Tasted just like it smells.
Ad I tried imitation crab last Friday at Meijo's, taken out of a piece of sushi. Didn't taste like anything, but it felt weird. A bad weird. So, tastewise I'm neutral, but the feeling made it go down to an "I didn't like it."

And, it looks like blogs are getting popular-ish. Damn. ):

I was accepted!

2009-01-24T00:25:00.000-08:00

I'm going to college! I'm going to college! I'm going to coooolege!

I'm watching Juno. I got in a very.... emotional? conversation with Steven so I'm wide awake. And that was like two hours ago. Nothing ended on a bad note, but it was still unpleasant. Just mild upsettedness probably on both ends caused by somewhat miscommunication due to selective hearing and all that shiz.

I'm positively addicted to playing solitaire on the computer. Last weekend I was up until 1 playing solitaire. Literally.

My eyes still hurt from crying on the phone. Bleh.

Steven, Carla, Paul and I went to Hometown Buffet. It was lovely. Seriously. You would not expect the best steak you could possibly ever have to be at hometown buffet. But it was. Delicious, amazing steak. Seriously. Killer. Then we went and chilled at Walmart, bought the card game version of Battle of the Sexes, and sat down at McDonalds to play. I surprised the guys because I knew that ABS was Anti-lock Braking System. And Paul surprised us by knowing who did the voice of Gloria in Happy Feet.

We got in a bit of an argument because he really doesnt want me to go to school somewhere else, so I really didnt even bother applying to anywhere except SDSU and CSUN. And Steven managed to say (what balls this boy has!) "It would be better if you had more choices."

WHAT THE HELL?! You guilt me into not even applying to more schools, (and I wanted to go to Portland!) and yet you have the balls to tell me I should have?! God.

So then we got upset with eachother and I got all emotional and o did he. I think all is well, but it wasnt lovely. I got into the whole thing about how I'm really tired of SD for a lot of reasons, and told him about how I have almost moved out several times, first to Bonnie's in Las Vegas before 8th grade, and then the long-time ongoing talk of going to live with Aunt Carolyn, and I got into all the reasons, including the ones I couldn't explain, of why I have wanted to go elsewhere. And so naturally he felt very guilty because he had no idea and it was just a big sad mess. All is well-ish and we are going to discuss how I feel about CSUN. I really want to get away.
And, yes, I care what his opinion is. Even if for some strange reason we don't last forever, I like to think we will. You can go ahead and be a negative nancy.

My grades are okay. Two are mediocre, one I didn't deserve, but I got 5 A's (Eng, Span, Calc, banda and banda), a B- (Gov) and a C+ (really a 75%, Physics).

Juno just ended. It somehow feels weird watching movies so late at night, epecially since I'm so tired. Since I actually finished the movie. Good movie.

We won't stop until somebody cops and even then we'll start again and just pretend that nothing ever happened.

Good night.

I feel sick.

2009-01-14T17:32:00.000-08:00

Life is so fragile.

Well.

2009-01-08T17:39:00.000-08:00

I just haven't had much to say over the past few days.
School has been mildly overwhelming, but not too eventful. There are some stupid, annoying girls in my 3rd period, but that's not really new.
I've been spending too much time not doing anything. But I don't feel like doing anything. So, oh well. Watching Gilmore Girls.
And tomorrow, sushi with Steven and his boyfriends! Of course, my usual teriyaki chicken bowl. Yum! Gotta love them.
Chicken sounds good, too. Not so much teriyaki, which will be delicious of course, but yummmmm. Just plain ol' chicken sounds great.
I love watching old episodes of Gilmore Girls. Dramatic Irony: When the audience realizes what is going on while the character or characters don't. And although they don't give a definite "This is what happens" after the series ended, it's always fun knowing who got together and what happened with this character and whatnot. Exciting.
It's getting cold and I'm getting munchy. So, that's all the more I have to say about today. And all things, really.

New year, New Look, New Paige.

2009-01-02T22:45:00.000-08:00

Ten points if you can name that show.

What I want in my life:
A Best Friend
A Husband who loves me.
At least Two Kids
A house in Lido Isle (only 1.5 mil for a 3 bedroom! My heart is set!)
A vehicle, at least a bicycle.
College Degree
A business of some sort

What I want to do in the next year:
Get a job
Find an apartment/house/living place
Get a pet?
Learn to cook at least 10 different meals
Taste fish
Watch a little less television; read a few more newspapers.
Get a subscription to an intelligent magazine.
Listen to more music.
Take a dance class.
Eat more veggies and less red meat.
Spend more time with the people I love, even if it means spending time with people I don't like.
Floss.
Donate more things; don't throw so much in the trash.
Never under dress.
Spend a little more time at the beach.
Find a nice looking hat.
Ride my bike a little more.
Be more appreciative.
Learn to make clothing.

Now, remind me to remember this list. I'll be keeping an eye out for that hat. I need one that looks good on me.

Merry happy new year. Good luck, y'all.

I had a great year.

2009-01-01T11:25:00.000-08:00

There's just too much to say about all that has happened. Bad things, good things, scary things (those almost-crashes), funny things, etc. I think it all evened out to Good. Very Good. In fact, this very well might be the best year I have had.
I learned to cook and bake. The past week or two I've been, for lack of better terminology, 'tidying' up. Like, I notice something that is out of place, and I will put it where it belongs. That is big for me. I have good grades! I ended my junior year with STRAIGHT A'S! I've avoided junk food pretty well. I've stayed mostly healthy, typically safe, and I'd say 85-90% happy. And I am glad.

And there are so many things I hope and think and dream of for this next year, and beyond. I'm going to be going off to college (though it's not too far off), maybe even move out of my home. I'm going to have to learn to take care of myself. And I'm excited about that. Very excited.
Because, you know, it's a challenge. An unavoidable challenge. You fail the game of life, you end up on the street or back at home or six feet under. So I'm excited because in this part of growing up, it could get to a point where I mature by force! Y'know, kinda like how marines go to boot camp as children and come back as men. That kind of thing. (Obviously not the same. You know what I mean.)

There is so much I want to write down and express and describe, but I don't know how to. This past year was a great one, and it will be hard to beat. But I think that is my New Year's Resolution, condensed into one sentence (condensed from a huge list): Make this year, 2009, the best year yet. Whatever that may mean, right now or in a year from now, make 2009 the best year.

------------------------------------

Mexicali was fun! The lady at the nearby store basically stole some change from Steven. Short changed him. He only got like 20-someodd pesos back from the bottle of Coke he paid for with a 5$.

I got to play with fireworks. It was AWESOME! I got to light them and stuffs. and we played lots of card games. 'Twas muy fun.

And I kept responding to thinks said in Spanish amusingly: "Tu novia se habla espanol?" and I respond "No."
Kinda funny.

Well. Mom's bugging me to do things and bugging me about not doing things despite the fact that she's the reason I didn't.... blah blah...

Yeah.
Happy new year. No, really. Make it a happy one.

P.S. Spending time with Zan and Kayla? Awesome.

Christmas.

2008-12-26T19:59:00.000-08:00

I got a blanket and Football For Dummies. I have needed a phone since March. I got a blanket.

We got a fancy new tv. With what money? I'm not sure either. And it was from Rent A Center, meaning we're spending 1800$ on a 1000$ tv. And yet Mom hasn't paid her car payment or anything.

I have yet to go find out what Steven and his family got me because I haven't seen him since Sunday because Hitler Woman has had me cleaning all week, then Steven was busy. And I shouldn't be mad at him, but I am. Maybe you can come over today before we go to the Picture place, Rose! But you can only s tay for an hour. I need to take a shower before we go.
Oops, sorry, Steven. Judi just got in the shower and Mom's watching Julissa.
It's okay. Maybe I can come over afterwards!
So I finished his fucking scarf, after two hours, and they're still at the mall. Maybe going to the movies, too.
I'm sorry, Rose. It's not my fault. We've been sitting here for 3 hours. I'm sorry.
And the only thing I'm thinking is how I can't believe he, well, kinda stood me up.

I can't just accept the fact that he's busy and both of his sisters are in town and it's really unfair of me to be mad. But I am.

Christmas was at our house this year. Uncle, Missy, Janet and dog came down. It was fun. I had to go to bed early with Missy because Santa still exists, & he brought her a little kid, Razor vespa-type thing. She was so excited. And I got to open Football for Dummies. We also got these Rock Band music tracks, but I really don't care about those. I don't really play it much.

I feel really upset and ungrateful. I'm sitting here, practically crying because Steven is too busy to get his fucking DS, scarf, and jacket, nagging on this blog because I got a blanket and my phone won't charge and I'm stuck using the phone that I can't make phone calls with because my mom decided we need a 47 in. tv, and Rosie is soooooo understanding that she won't care that she's not getting a phone, I'll buy her one at the end of January!

Yeah. But Mom promised me a DS, christmas of '06, but didn't have the money. So she said she'd buy it at the end of January, after she got paid, and I ended up buying myself one in August of 2008.

I feel like I deserve a slap. I can't just enjoy my family and my $10-blanket, so I'm jealous of Steven's perfect happy fun family and pissed at this nice, gigantic television.

No, really. Please just slap me.

Why do people murder?

2008-12-20T21:23:00.000-08:00

I've heard excuses, such as mental disorders and insanity.
I've heard horror stories galore.
But I have never truly understood.

WHY THE FUCK WOULD YOU MURDER SOMEONE?!

Just came home, and what's on is a top whatever list of wanted people. This guy slaughtered five people, five women, duct taped them up, a nd basically posted them somewhere, and a sixth was nearly dead and screaming her lungs out.

WHY THE FUCK DID YOU DO THAT?!

I really don't get these things.

And this guy killed a ten year old boy! The day before his 11th birthday! Give me one good fucking reason!

Argh. These tv shows make me both upset and frightened.

I don't really have too much to say.

2008-12-20T11:38:00.000-08:00

In a frenzy to clean the house before Christmas, as we decided to host it this year, we're yelling and arguing and fighting and complaining. Mom has hardly said anything nice today. Judi's being a bitch and I'm being one back to her. I just want to leave.

I was trying to finish Steven's scarf by today, as we might be going up to Julian for some snow fun, but there was a huge knot. My mom spent at least 4 hours untangling it and it's still not usable. I finished a hat (really just fastened it at the top) I mostly made 3 years ago with a Knifty Knitter knitting loom thing, and I'm proud.

I'm glad we're on break, but somehow anxious. I'm worried that I won't accomplish much. Last night I baked cookies. Today I shredded Negative Balance bank papers. 2006 was a bad year for my mom, it seems. I also played a lot of Sims. My doggies on the game had puppies! They're so cute!

I always feel bad thinking negative thoughts about people, especially my family members, but it has been happening a lot lately. I was being a brat towards Judi today, bugging her about school and such. I asked her how her grades are, she said Good, and then I asked what they are ans she says she hasn't checked. She wants to go to PIMA next semester. I talked to her about it, and it's because she doesn't want to spend 4 more years at a Uni. I mentioned that she would only need to spend two years there, and she said "at least." PIMA is 10,400$ that you pay over the 9 months I suppose. And you don't have to take history classes or anything. All just pharmacy related stuff. Judi took chemistry last year, wants to be a pharmacist, and can't tell me the chemical symbol for Potassium. It's K. I know that.

I need to take a shower soon. I never do on Friday nights, it seems, just out of habit. I'm sleepy, not just tired, but I got plenty of sleep.

Oh. One thing that really irritated me this morning was Judi getting mad that I hadn't started breakfast yet. When I got up, I said I think I'll make breakfast, but went straight for the computer. when she came out of the room, she started nagging about how "Well, usually you'd expect someone to make breakfast, you know, after they wake up."
Bitch. If you're going to be impatient, do it your own god damn self.

Bleh, like I said, being really negative here. I'm not unhappy, really. Just irritated. I'm really actaully happy, though. Two weeks with no school! Christmas! Presents! And Steven's family i all coming in today! His sisters are both coming in today.

It's probably bad that I'm more excited about being with his family than with being with mine. I love Uncle and Missy, but sometimes I just don't have enough energy to hang out with a 10 year old.

I need to go take my shower now, so I can go to Steven's at one. I hope we do end up going to Snowville. & Kayla, I'd invite you but it's with his family. Sorry.

Goodnight and have a pleasant tomorrow.

Dear FOX,

2008-12-11T20:46:00.001-08:00

Imperial Beach may not be the gem of San Diego. It might not be as family-friendly as other parts of the county are. There may be too many tattoo parlors and 'adult' stores. And, yes, every Wednesday morning the same man buries himself in our trashcan, ripping open bags, and recycles the cans that we don't. The water is polluted. There is a lot of drug use. There isn't really much business or many attractions (other than the obvious - the beach).
But I have lived here all my life (a whopping 17 years - and my most impressionable years at that!) and I turned out fine. I am not a drug user. No meth, cocaine, or even weed on me. I am not an alcoholic. I don't drink at all. I am not a whore.
Some parts of IB aren't exactly family friendly. And, well, as achild, my parents kept me away from those places! My dad used to take me to parks all the time, and to the library, and the beach, and the estuary. It's not like my dad asked me to wait outside of Romantix while he went in and bought porn!
And those apartments on the show? Overly dramatized. I have been in several houses and apartments in this city, and none of them have been terribly bad. The worst I've seen? Cat hair. Maybe an unimpotrant crack in the floor. And I've been in some of the worse houses.
No, really. I think you guys intentionally made that apartment look bad. I've been in the houses of single parents with three kids living in a one-bed house. The mother had one job, that's it. The house was cramped, but it was well taken care of. No mold, no roaches. Nothing like that.

Imperial Beach really isn't that bad. It could have more family-friendly places, and I'm sure they could lose most of those tattoo and porno shops. Replace them with a gymboree. Or an arcade. Or something. But to go around, making it seem like one of the poorest places in the country? No. That is uncalled for and unfair.
Take a drive down Fifth. Or California. Or most of the streets between Sports Park and Connecticut. LOOK AT SOME OF THOSE HOUSES! No, really! Look at them! Those have to be over $500k RIGHT NOW! Where most houses have gone down to like 150k$. Really nice houses. Really nice cars. Really nice RVs. YACHTS parked in the driveways! Last I checked, the homeless people by the 99 DON'T OWN YACHTS!
Be fair, FOX. Really. If you're going to show the bad, show at least a little good. Maybe just one house on California! Or Larissa Johnson's house. Something. Be fair. Yes, it's not a great city. Yes, there are many people below poverty lines. And, yes. There are many drug users, alcoholics, and homeless. But there are good parts, too.
And I came out just fine.

I don't really have much to say.

2008-12-03T20:24:00.000-08:00

I've been ridiculously tired lately. Like almost-can't-get-out-of-bed tired. At least, late-tired. Not getting up until last minute tired. No time for breakfast tired. Bleh.
The other day I went shopping with Kayla, and though we didn't buy anything except fries from SteakEscape, I had such a great time. I love going shopping, especially with her. Makes me feel female. I love it.

I think I know what I'm purchasing my pals for Christsmas. I think Carla is getting Drawn to Life, the DS game because it seems amusing and fun, but not something she'd buy herself. Maybe something else, too or besides, if something better comes along. Steven is getting the ltd edition DS from my mom, the Super Mario Bros one with the game. I think I'll get him a pair or jammie bottoms, I owe him his jacket, maybe a DS game, and I'm getting the family Pictionary Man. Have you seen the commercials for that? It looks so cool. Plus, whenever his family is over (his sisters, really), we play various games, like Mad Gab, Taboo, Cranium, Loteria or card games. I think adding one would be nice. Judi needs something. I just don't know what. My mom, maybe that Audrey Hepburn thing? Maybe something Charlie Brown, Peanuts. I liked the Peanuts Chess set but I don't think she'd use it ever.

I really don't know what to get Judi. I don't like anything she does, so I wouldn't enjoy shopping for her. It's not like I can judge by "I like this, and I'm sure she would too!" Maybe I should go into that sports store, find her something in there. How much were those chargers pajama pants?

Paul was talking about some of his sisters demands, like he has to get a job and can't go anywhere after school (jeez!), and he mentioned that she said he's getting an eviction notice for his birthday (What a nice sister.). So, I told him if he needs a roommate, I'm here. I don't know if he thought I was serious or not, but I think that could totally work. He seems simple enough that we wouldn't have a large need for a lot of crap, he's serious enough that the apartment or whatever wouldn't be messy and he'd probably not be the partying type. I think that could totally work. I'd much rather room with someone I know, too, as opposed to a total stranger I found on Craigslist. But I really can't wait until Steven's out of high school so we can move in together. We took a nap together the other day and I was so comfy I drooled. I never drool unless I'm sick! And I drooled. That takes serious skill.

But his attempt at making me responsible is annoying, despite how much I appreciate it. I can't take a friggin' nap because he's telling me to do my IRA. And it's not like he controls my life, of course, and he's trying to help, but I want to get back to where I can wake up in the morning. Nap might just help. >:l Damn helpful unhelpful boyfriend.

Well, I guess that's really all that's on my mind.
Oh, and my mom. She wants to buy an Xbox from Rent a center. For like twice the price, she gets to pay it off over a three month period! Judi agrees with her. $500 xbox instead of $200.I tried arguing, forgetting that arguing with her doesn't work. She gets mad at me, and Judi gets mad at me because I'm stupid and don't understand anything at all. But who will be the stupid one when Judi goes into debt and can't pay her rent on her apartment and her babydaddy left her because no one has sex with loved ones outside of true relatiosnhips...
Argh. Sorry for that. I just can't picture how her future will end up.

I feel pretty selfish.

2008-11-25T16:58:00.000-08:00

I want so much for Christmas this year. I could make a list but it would be boring beyond belief. I had such high hopes of all the stuff I was going to buy for everyone else and didn't think about me at all. Now that the time comes, I can't think of anything else but me.
Shoes! Clothes! That awesome Rushmore blazer! Video games! iPhone! Boots! Selfish!

I know I would never end up buying myself everything and not buying anything for anyone else. But it's nice to dream (haha). I literally can't stop mentally listing all the many, many things I want. And, I've stopped caring about everyone else (temporarily, of course). I feel like a bad person. Gah.
But look at it!

And there are so many other things I want so badly! Gah!

What's the one thing you want most? Go ahead and be selfish. I am.

As a volunteer at the Mother Goose Parade...

2008-11-23T20:43:00.000-08:00

...I got t o meet celebrities, get autographs, AND get community service!

Of course, I feel guilty about planning to turn in the community service hours, but whatevs. I was there offering help if it was needed. It just wasn't needed.

I got autographs from Tony Oller from As The Bell Rings, Kaycee Stoh from HSM, Ashley Somethingorother from Bring It On, and her male co-star from the movie. Also got to see: Matthew Underwood and another girl from Zoey 101 who had way too much foundation/powder on, Jake from Unfabulous, Sam from iCarly! (she had slightly frizziness to her curls-I thought that only happened to me! Made me feel good) who was really nice, the new Menudo (Asian Guy had cool shoes), Lou Ferrigno, Alan Thicke, Tori Spelling on the float, The G Girls (skankily dressed 14 year olds who looked ten, with big hair), and a few others who I can't think of. As my first encounter with celebrities EVER, to actually have a mini-conversation with, like, Tony Oller was mindblowing. And, sure, it would've been cooler if it was the real famous people and not the co-stars, but it was still awesome. Pictures of my autographed Volunteer shirt will be posted later.

I know it sounds so dorky, but I can't believe they're real people! And I can't believe we could just stand around there with them. Like they were real people! Heh. They didn't look at us weird and the only one that seemed any bit superior was Kaycee, who talked to me like I was five ("Thank you for being such great fans!" Gee. I have a sister who's older than you, and I'm going to college in a year. I'm not a friggin' baby).

I don't know. Something about the way they seemed just so comfortable made me want to be famous. Not the money, or the cool clothes, or the cute mini-limos, or the fangirls. The way they seemed happy, normal, and not supreme but cool anyway made me want to be one of them.

Like the popular girls, except way better.

I love these silly milk commercials.

2008-11-21T19:35:00.000-08:00

Today was the first time I spent time with my sweetie all friggin' week. After he was sick, he missed school, left school early, and had to make up a test. So no after school together time until today, since Monday. And it may seem trivial, but it's so lonely without him here. ): So today I made him waffles when he came over.

I'm getting fairly good with this whole "cooking" thing. I like these potatoes. My kind-of wannabe-ish Sbarro potatoes. Not nearly as good, of course. But I'm proud of my Better Homes and Gardens Cookbook cooking. They're simple, too. Perfect for a beginner. So glad Mom has such a collection of (rarely-used) cookbooks.

I've been feeling somewhat worthless lately, since I haven't done much except read random peoples' blogs. I mean, I wrote one freakin' paragraph for the Dr. Faustus essay. And I thought I was going to do so well. =/ And I'm so sleepy, that I hardly pay attention in classes. I've been laying my head down on the desks more often (and drawing on them constantly- I can finally kinda draw hands!) and doing classwork less often. Eh. I could so be doing better right now. But instead I've been brushing up on my housekeeping skills. Mostly my cooking! I love making waffles now. And my meats aren't too bad.
I totally want a cutesy egg timer. There are quite a few of them on Anthropologie that I would kill for, including the Cock-a-doodle timer (no, it's not the one above. But it is a cute chicken). In fact, I can't wait until I marry a millionaire and can buy all the cutesy kitchen tools I want.

What cutesy kitchen item do you want most? My mom has an Idaho butter dish. It's a baked potato with a triangle of butter and the word Idaho.

I totally love this cookie jar, salt, and pepper shaker set! :
$25 at target for all three. So adorable!

Brunettes Not Fighter Jets

2008-11-18T19:08:00.000-08:00

I think I'm a little sleepy. I don't really know why. After school was uneventful, as Steven left school early, sick. I like the game Kayla has, the Professor Layton whatever stuff. I like the puzzles.

Well, I feel totally lousy from being so lazy. I need to fucking wake up, or something. Start doing stuff like I know I need to. But I know I need to. So, why don't I? I'm going to send in all my crap too late or forget things until it's too late... and augh. I'm going to totally screw myself over. I just know it. But I can't make myself do anything! I don't know how to make me do anything! I totally wish Steven was abusive or something, so he'd give me a wake up call or something.

So, ugh. Wake up, Rose! Tomorrow I will do things I need to do! I will not let myself fail!...

But I don't want to do anything right now.

=/ I'm going to go take a nap or something. Steven needs to wake up. I need company. ):

...Have I mentioned that I have STUPID FAMILY?

2008-11-17T18:47:00.001-08:00

So, Judi said she was going to Jr's on Sunday. She took Mom's van, because "it was there." Not her car. Mom's van. And supposedly she and Jr. went to the grocery store or something. When they came out of the store, they got into the van, and started leaving, and apparently someone had put a shopping cart right next to the van on the passenger side. And somehow neither Judi nor Jr. noticed it. So there was a scratch. Little scratch, says Judi. Caused by the shopping cart on the passenger side that somehow neither Judi nor Jr. saw.

Mom didn't think too much of it. Little scratch, by a shopping cart. No big deal. Until this morning, when she decided to take a look at it.

Three feet long. From the passenger door to the back tire. At it's deepest, a quarter inch thick.

$2000 to fix. And my mom's somewhat poor.

So, she calls Judi. No answer. So she decides to call Junior. He's been in Carlsbad all weekend. Didn't see Judi at all, has no idea what she's talking about. Uh-oh.

Judi calls Mom back. Mom knows Judi clearly lied. What's the real story, Judi, and why did you feel you had to lie to me?

I, uh.... I was.... Well.... I was at Cynthia's yesterday. I didn't want you to know I was talking to her again. I figured you'd get mad. And, well, uh, you know how Cynthia always has trouble maneuvering around that pole? Well... she ended up backing into the side of the van.

And somehow didn't realize it for three fucking feet.

$2000 to fix. And Judi has no job. She gets $20/week allowance. She smokes weed and needs gas money and needs to get fake nails all the damn time. This is coming out of Mom's empty pocket.

"If you ever lie to me again, you will no longer be welcome in this house. You understand me?"

I mean, I've made Mom upset before. And, oh, how miserable she makes you feel when you got one C on your report card, or when you're simply grumpy and taking it out on the family. But when you screw up her car ($2000 to fix it!) AND lie to her about the causes? My God, I can only imagine how Judi felt.

But how stupid can you get? Cynthia caused Judi such drama with a girl she doesn't know to the point where five guys and the girl came to our house to beat the shit out of her and to watch it happen (and how lucky we all are that Judi wasn't home!) and she's at Cynthia's like nothing happened? And this is what happens?

Judi wasn't supposed to be using Mom's fucking car. And she shouldn't have been at Cynthia's. And now my mom has to take the blow. That's a whole paycheck! I can't believe this. I can't fucking believe it.

STUPID FAMILY TUPID FAMILY STUPID FAMILY

2008-11-11T18:25:00.000-08:00

YOU DON'T FUCKING CLEAN BY PUTTING SHIT IN A BAG AND MOVING IT TO YOUR FILTHY ROOM!

...Forgive me. Just needed to get it out.

Tuck that thing in before you get it caught on a trip wire!

2008-11-11T10:43:00.000-08:00

This morning, I made some waffles! I feel kind of cheap saying I made them, since all I did was pour batter in the iron, and I use powdered mix, but I guess it's better than Eggos.

"Hey Bubba."
"Hey Forrest."

I love this movie, but it's so sad. Especially at this part (Bubba's dying). If Forrest Gump was a real person.... Wow. He'd be a pretty remarkable person. All the things he's been through, all the people he's met, all the things he witnessed! He taught Elvis how to dance, for goodness's sake!

My mom has some weird, stupid idea of how to reorganize the house. The dining room will be where the living room is now, then the living room will be where the 'family room' is, and the computer will go in the now dining room, and the 'music corner' crap will go along the wall in the now living room, in the way of the damn door. It's not going to work, it's pointless, and I just don't get it. What's wrong with it the way it is? It'll be perfect if it's clean. But, who cares about cleaning it? Let's just move all the shit around.

Most of the crap is hers anyway. And she's a packrat, really. "Do you want this bottle anymore" she asks, as she holds up an Adventure Dome bottle.
"No, mom. I don't need it."
"Well, you could take it to school."
"I take already bottled water to school. I don't need it, I don't use it, and I won't use it. We don't need it."
"Well, okay, I'll ask Jesse if he wants it." Similar story with all the other junk we have. I do have some junk, for various reasons, but she has so much junk. She has tons of clothes she doesn't wear, and every few months she decides she needs a new outfit, and it just so happens that there's a sale! so she spends like 300$ like that. I get 200$ in clothes, maybe, in a whole year. And I get rid of stuff. She has all the clothes she's ever owned. She never gets rid of them. And she has a dresser that's full of clothes that hasn't been opened in at least six months. And these 'totes' (plastic tubs she gives fancy names) filled with sweaters and jackets, because when she put them in there over a year ago, it was too hot for them. Again, they haven't been opened since. So they're obviously not missed. But, enough with that annoyance.

On to another annoyance. Blowing my nose. Can't do it. I have to breathe out of my mouth, and my nose is so plugged (in a really annoying, not wet just thick way) that I can't blow it. Makes my ear pop. Just the left ear. And it doesn't accomplish anything. And everytime I try to breathe through my nose, it sounds like a damn lawn mower.

On a lighter note, I like Sally Fields's bedroom in this movie. Pretty wallpaper. Kinda plain, but somehow pretty. And I love this movie. It's moving, in a way. Such a greaet movie.

To the reader of this post, would you be upset if your 6 year old son wanted a barbie, or your daughter wanted t play with Daddy's tools? I'm reading an article on Babble right now about how most parents get more worried/upset/shocked when their son crosses gender lines than when it's a daughter. What do you think? To you, would it make a difference? I think I'd worry more about my son getting picked on, but I don't really care if he'd come out gay.

My back kind of hurts, in just one spot. And I just took the last of the Nyquil. And Forrest Gump is just lovely. I'm going to get off to my lovely day now.

Cough syrup? That's a dumb way to get loded, Jack.

2008-11-08T15:11:00.000-08:00

I'm sick, I think it's official. Not too bad for the moment, but if it's the same thing I had a month ago (feels the same so far) I'm going to get worse. Swollen tonsils/throat, hurts to swallow from my throat to me ears, and my nose is getting runny and sneezy. Luckily, I have Nyquil. Unluckily, Nyquil made me fall asleep and didn't wake up the rest of me when I woke up. Now my arms and legs all feel like jelly. Boy, does walking feel weird.

Steven's phone died last night and he's at his brother's house without a charger, so I have no Steven to keep me company. ): But at least he's probably having fun with Sophia. Steven told me she finally calls him Tio. That's new since the last time we saw her. And she really likes fish.

I want to open a clothing boutique. I want to start sewing. I have a lot of ideas drawn out, or pictures of items to basically copy, or just thoughts in my head. I want to start on Etsy, and maybe if my clothing sells a lot, I'll open up a real store. I was considering doing that this weekend, starting to sew again. But today I just feel lazy. Sleep, television, and The Flintstones are enough for me.

In other news, I think I might be a Republican. Or at least be leaning in that direction. Shocking, I know! But I think I might be. Maybe it's just Dr. Cole rubbing off on me.

My throat hurts. I don't think I should go to Kayla's today ): because her immune system SUCKS. (No offense). I don't want to get her sick. But I do want popcorn, movies, and hot cocoa.

I hope I get better soon. Nyquil tastes nasty. Note to self, don't buy the green-flavored.

He Ate One of the Sister's Brothers.

2008-11-07T15:26:00.000-08:00

I don't know. I think I'm mad at Steven. Irritated. Last night he told me he isn't coming home after school tomorrow (today) because his mom is picking him up and they're going to Jr's. He said he'd ask his mom if I could come along.

And, of course, he didn't.

I know, it' no big deal, but it was irritating. He assumed his mom would say no, so he wouldn't even ask.

I guess I'm over it, now. I'm fairly excited for the four day weekend. Might as well be spring break. Eating pasta with spaghetti sauce, watching Full House. I think later I'll watch some movie. I'm thinking Darjeeling. I wish I knew where Garden State was. And hopefully this weekend sometime I'll be spending the night at Kayla's. And I'm really glad. When I hang out with her, it's a different type of conversation than with Carla or, of course, Steven. And, of course, I love Carla, but there's just some personal things I can't talk to her about. That's where Kayla comes in.

I've been drinking a surprising amount of water lately. I've had two bottles in he past hour or so. Four total for the day. It's been this way the past few days, too. At first I freaked out and automatically assumed there was something wrong with me, but now I just think I'm thirsty.

I want to go to a good beach. Like, one that isn't all Tijuana's sewage. One with blue water. And pretty sand. I'm thinking La Jolla. I want to go there sometime soon. I love the cove. Perfect beach.

So, last night I had a weird dream in which I turned 21, and to celebrate, my mom had me go into a 7-11 to buy some cigarettes and sum weird type of alcohol in a fancy bottle (not one that I can think of that actually exists. It was like fancy rum). I went in, and I could not find the type she wanted. I looked all over, for almost an hour! when my mom finally came in to help me. She got mad because I couldn't find it, but she couldn't either, so she was mad and just grabbed a bottle of Jack and a 2-liter Coke. Weird dreams no longer really affect me, though.

I think my plans for this weekend are basically just writing my personal statement, maybe then applying to some schools, maybe I could go to Joann's and buy a new needle and sew something, and of course I have a sleepover planned with Kayla! (: I hope the weekend goes well.

Ta ta for now.

Nothing noteworthy today.

2008-11-03T17:31:00.000-08:00

So, today I made a cool paper airplane. While Steven and I were playing 'throw it back and forth' today at lunch, though, it found its way onto the roof. We both kinda decided 'oh well,' but like twenty minutes later it fell down!

I decided today that I'm content with my decision to stay right here in sunny Southern California. When I woke up, it was beautiful and sunny outside. Though I think I do prefer pretty gray skies and chilly weather, sunny skies and warm mornings can be awfully cheery, and I think I'd miss them too much if I ever moved.

So, I'm watching last night's Desperate Housewives. It seems like.... well, just a few things that go on are retarded. Or obviously going to end a certain way. For instance, Susan just walked into Jackson's house, heard the shower running, and decided "Golly! I'm going to strip down and join him!" and of course you knew something was going to go wrong. And, of course, something did.

Dia de la Lazy.

2008-11-02T16:11:00.000-08:00

I did it! I finished reading The Jungle by Upton Sinclair. And the last 50 or so pages? Terribly boring. I kind of skipped through the last ten or so pages, because I liked the meat of the story, the plot! not all the Socialist ramblings. My overall opinion? It was such a depressing book. It was a very, very good book, but it was so depressing. I love/hate how at the end of damn near every chapter, something bad happened. Of course, that kept it interesting, as you wanted to keep reading to see how Jurgis would get out of that one. But why can't something good happen to the poor guy?!
Next thing I need to do is calculus homework, but that shouldn't take too long, I hope. It's just practicing the chain rule. Just have to hope I don't get confused. And then physics homework, and I have laundry in the washer and I need to shower and I hope mom buys bedding for the guinea pig. Piggy needs a bath, a clean cage, and some trimmed nails. I wonder what would happen if I painted them? But, he's a guy piggy, so I'd feel wrong.
Yesterday I went to see High School Musical with my little cousin, Missy, and Judi. It was cute. It just seemed too short. Like, not a lot happened. And, if you really think about it, not a lot did happen. I really liked the 'getting ready for prom' scene for the play-part of it. I loved the part where they did the whole 'meet the parents' and all. Made me excited for my prom, even though I'm still undecided as to whether I'm going, even though it's not until May.
So, as this is my first post, I figure I should write a little about me. But I'm not really sure what to write about me. My name is Rose. I have an awesome boyfriend, Steven, and two friends, Kayla and Carla. I love holidays and I'm backward-nostalgic: I spend most of my time dreaming about my future. I'm a seventeen year old senior, and I think I want to be a teacher. I live in San Diego, CA. I'm lazy, very smart, not popular, and happy. I really, really love life. Usually. Just not on 1-3-5 days. I enjoy reading, as long as I find a good book. I was a mermaid for halloween. I like wearing dresses. I'm not beautiful in the normal sense, but Steven says I am.
Anyway, I'll probably post here whenever I can actually remember to. I'm not terribly busy, and I spend too much time on the computer, but I never really keep up with blogging. I always get too lazy, or just forget.
Well, that's it for me! 'Til next time,
Rose.